Statistics Quotes
+14Round numbers are always false.
- Samuel Johnson
+7The minute a statistician steps into the position of the executive who must make decisions and defend them, the statistician ceases to be a statistician.
- W.E. Deming
+1Figures don’t lie, but liars figure.
- Samuel Clemens
+1Statistics are the heart of democracy.
- Simeon Strunsky
+1Statistics are designed to keep you safe.
- Jenny Diski
+1You cannot feed the hungry on statistics.
- George Lloyd
+1There are lies, damned lies, and statistics!
- B. Disraeli
+1If two wrongs don’t make a right, try three.
- Laurence Peter
+1Torture numbers, and they’ll confess to anything.
- Gregg Easterbrook
+1I can prove anything by statistics except the truth.
- George Canning
+1Statistics are human beings with the tears wiped off.
- Paul Brodeur
+1It is a capital mistake to theorize before one has data.
- Sir Arthur Conan Doyle
+1A witty statesman said, you might prove anything by figures.
- Carlyle
+1A single death is a tragedy, a million deaths is a statistic.
- Joseph Stalin
+1The death of one man is a tragedy.The death of millions is a statistic.
- Joe Stalin
+1There are two kinds of statistics, the kind you look up and the kind you make up.
- Rex Stout
+1If your experiment needs statistics, you ought to have done a better experiment.
- Ernest Rutherford
+1Statistics are like lampposts: they are good to lean on, but they don’t shed much light.
- Storm P
+1Definition of Statistics: The science of producing unreliable facts from reliable figures.
- Evan Esar
+1Statistics are like bikinis. What they reveal is suggestive, but what they conceal is vital.
- Aaron Levenstein
+1To understand God’s thoughts we must study statistics, for these are the measure of his purpose.
- Florence Nightingale
+1Statistics are like women; mirrors of purest virtue and truth, or like whores to use as one pleases.
- Theodor Billroth
+1Statistics is the art of never having to say you’re wrong. Variance is what any two statisticians are at.
- C.J. Bradfield
+1The only useful function of a statistician is to make predictions, and thus to provide a basis for action.
- W.E. Deming
+1Politicians use statistics in the same way that a drunk uses lamp postsöfor support rather than illumination.
- Andrew Lang
+1Statistics: The only science that enables different experts using the same figures to draw different conclusions.
- Evan Esar
+1… the actual and physical conduct of an experiment must govern the statistical procedure of its interpretation.
- R. A. Fisher
+1Statistical thinking will one day be as necessary for efficient citizenship as the ability to read and write.
- H.G.Wells
+1Statistician: A man who believes figures don’t lie, but admits that under analysis some of them won’t stand up either.
- Evan Esar
+1A statistician is a person who stands in a bucket of ice water, sticks their head in an oven and says “on average, I feel fine!”
- K.Dunnigan
+1Statistics are the triumph of the quantitative method, and the quantitative method is the victory of sterilityand death.
- Joseph Hilaire
+1A knowledge of statistics is like a knowledge of foreign languages or of algebra; it may prove of use at any time under any circumstances.
- A.L. Bowley
