Funny Quotes and Sayings
- Funny Birthday Quotes
- Funny Golf Quotes
- Funny Marriage Quotes
- Funny Men Quotes
- Funny Witty Quotes
- Funny Women Quotes
+132I’ve got problem for your solution.
- Anonymous
+94Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk by again ?
- Anonymous
+92When I was born I was so surprised I didn’t talk for a year and a half.
- Gracie Allen
+74It isn’t homework unless it’s due tomorrow.
- Anonymous
+62Behind every successful man is a surprised woman.
- Maryon Pearson
+62The man who says his wife can’t take a joke, forgets that she took him.
- Oscar Wilde
+60Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else.
- Will Rogers
+54Most people are only alive because it is illegal to shoot them.
- Anonymous
+48Friendships last when each friend thinks he has a slight superiority over the other.
- Anonymous
+48The difference between genius and stupidity is; genius has its limits.
- Albert Einstein
+48If more than one Mouse is Mice then more than one Spouse is SPICE..!!
- Anonymous
+48Never interrupt your opponent while he’s making a mistake.
- Anonymous
+44Why did God create men? Because vibrators can’t mow the lawn.
- Anonymous
+42Until I was thirteen, I thought my name was shut up.
- Joe Namath
+42The only place you find success before work is in the dictionary.
- Anonymous
+40As long as there are tests, there will be prayer in schools.
- Anonymous
+40I can resist everything except temptation.
- Oscar Wilde
+40Every rule has an exception. Especially this one.
- Anonymous
+38Everyone has a photographic memory… some just don’t have film.
- Anonymous
+38When a man steals your wife there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.
- Anonymous
+34My father hated radio and he could not wait for television to be invented so that he could hate that too.
- Peter De Vries
+34It’s not cheating unless you get caught.
- Anonymous
+34Knowledge is realizing that the street is one-way, wisdom is looking both directions anyway.
- Anonymous
+34Perfect numbers like perfect men are very rare.
- Anonymous
+32If it begins with a wink, it can end with a slap.
+30You never learn anything by doing it right.
- Anonymous
+30Don’t play too much golf. Two rounds a day are plenty.
- Anonymous
+30To generalize on women is dangerous. To specialize on them is infinitely worse.
- Anonymous
+30Flying is simple. You just throw yourself at the ground and miss.
- Anonymous
+30Avoid hangovers stay drunk.
- Anonymous
+29It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
- Anonymous
+28The real trouble with reality is that there’s no background music.
- Anonymous
+28The only thing a golfer needs is more daylight.
- Anonymous
+26To attract men, I wear a perfume called ‘New Car Interior’.
- Anonymous
+26I think crime pays. The hours are good, you travel a lot.
- Anonymous
+26I have a tip that can take 5 strokes off anyone’s golf game. It’s called an eraser.
- Anonymous
+26I play golf with friends sometimes, but there are never friendly games.
- Anonymous
+26Common sense is the most evenly distributed quantity in the world. Everyone thinks he has enough.
- Anonymous
+24The quickest way to a man’s heart is through his chest.
- Anonymous
+24It is true that I was born in Iowa, but I can’t speak for my twin sister.
- Anonymous
