Homer J Simpson Quotes
+11Operator, give me the number for 911!
- Homer J Simpson
+4Ah, beer, my one weakness. My achilles heel, if you will.
- Homer J Simpson
+4You tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is ‘never try’.
- Homer J Simpson
+3Hateful to me as the gates of Hades is that man who hides one thing in his heart and speaks another.
- Homer J Simpson
+3Kill my boss? Do I dare live out the American dream?
- Homer J Simpson
+1I’m in no condition to drive…wait! I shouldn’t listen to myself, I’m drunk!
- Homer J. Simpson
+1Here’s to alcohol: the cause of, and solution to, all of life’s problems.
- Homer J Simpson
+1A decent boldness ever meets with friends.
- Homer J Simpson
+1In youth and beauty wisdom is but rare!
- Homer J Simpson
+1The outcome of the war is in our hands; the outcome of words is in the council.
- Homer J Simpson
+1Getting out of jury duty is easy. The trick is to say you’re prejudiced against all races.
- Homer J Simpson
+1If you don’t like your job you don’t strike. You just go in every day and do it really half assed. That’s the American way.
- Homer J Simpson
+1All men have need of the gods.
- Homer J Simpson
+1The fates have given mankind a patient soul.
- Homer J Simpson
+1How vain, without the merit, is the name.
- Homer J Simpson
+1Who ne’er knew salt, or heard the billows roar.
- Homer J Simpson
+1I live an idle burden to the ground.
- Homer J Simpson
+1A guest never forgets the host who had treated him kindly.
- Homer J Simpson
+1Rare gift! but oh, what gift to fools avails!
- Homer J Simpson
+1Don’t worry boy, it’s a controlled burn. I don’t know the chemical reaction, but fire made it good.
- Homer J Simpson
+1Nothing is more miserable than man, Of all upon the earth that breathes and creeps.
- Homer J Simpson
+1Roads are just a suggestion, like pants.
- Homer J Simpson
+1Seven cities warr’d for Homer being dead, Who living had no roofe to shroud his head.
- Homer J Simpson
+1Gloomy as night he stands.
- Homer J Simpson
+1I never apologize. I’m sorry, but that’s just the way I am.
- Homer J. Simpson
+1To alcohol, the cause and solution to all of life’s problems.
- Homer J Simpson
+1Even his griefs are a joy long after to one that remembers all that he wrought and endured.
- Homer J Simpson
+1Anger, which, far sweeter than trickling drops of honey, rises in the bosom of a man like smoke.
- Homer J Simpson
+1Beer is the cause and solution to all of life’s problems.
- Homer J Simpson
+1Beer. Now there’s a temporary solution.
- Homer J Simpson
0Ah, good ol’ trustworthy beer. My love for you will never die.
- Homer J Simpson
0A sympathetic friend can be quite as dear as a brother.
- Homer J Simpson
0Trying is the first step to failure.
- Homer J Simpson
